Aging with Delight and Grace
Good morning,
I want you all to know that I'm determined that it's up to each one of us as to how we age. There have been many times in my life when I did things "kicking and screaming." I would deny and fight the reality. It wasn't fun, but I suppose it fit a purpose of some sort. Well, now that I/ we are aging, I thought I'd examine the "how to age" concept a bit.
I wrote a couple of weeks ago about having knee surgery. I'll spare the details; but the previous year took a toll. It started with a fall and a hematoma on my shin, then, I hurt my knee, etc. For nearly a year, there was little exercise. I gained a good 10 pounds, on top of 10 pounds too much that I already carried. I got flabby. I felt very unattractive and insecure about my body. I would try to tell myself -- hey, you look pretty good for a 61 year old. That was true -- I certainly dress well, have a good sense of presence and know how to conceal the pounds. But, I knew. I ranted about getting older and how it's not fair and how the body isn't what it used to be, etc.
What I didn't do, however, was take responsibility at that point for all that had happened to me - my fall, my injury, my weight gain, my eating habits, etc. I just made excuses and whined. I dated some, but wasn't in a long-term relationship and not having a lot (or when I was having it, it wasn't "great") sex -- so I would say, "Look, I hardly drink, I don't do drugs, I'm not having sex -- don't take my fu....ng FOOD away from me." It was my joke --- but I didn't admit it was my joke on myself.
After my knee surgery, my doctor said, "you have to lose weight". I cried and felt it was a daunting task -- even though it's about 20 - 25 pounds (as opposed to people "really" overweight.)
This morning, I read an article about Jamie Lee Curtis ( the actress). She's turning 50 and will be in AARP magazine soon. Here's a quote: "I want to be older," she tells the magazine. "I actually think there's an incredible amount of self-knowledge that comes with getting older. I feel way better now than I did when I was 20. I'm stronger, I'm smarter in every way, I'm so much less crazy than I was then."
I love what she says. She goes on to take responsibility for how she looks. I'm doing the same.
I have a new boyfriend. He's a couple of years older than me. He's thin, fit, trim, athletic, a great/ healthy eater. What an inspiration. He's attracted to me as I am AND he's open about wanting me to be healthier so I can live longer and maybe share a longer life with him. How cool is that.
For the first time, in a long time, I'm motivated about looking good BECAUSE it will mean I'm healthier. I love to look good -- always have. Like I said, I dress well, am sexy and desireable (with my clothes on) ... but, I've fooled myself too long.
I'll keep you informed of how I'm doing.
To start, I'm walking longer each day as my knee heals, I'm making much better food choices. But, most importantly, I'm not making excuses ... just taking action.
Point: We, and only we, are responsible for how we age. We can approach it with disgust OR we can be delighted about the mystery and adventure of aging and face it with delight. I choose the later.
Happy aging with Grace!
I want you all to know that I'm determined that it's up to each one of us as to how we age. There have been many times in my life when I did things "kicking and screaming." I would deny and fight the reality. It wasn't fun, but I suppose it fit a purpose of some sort. Well, now that I/ we are aging, I thought I'd examine the "how to age" concept a bit.
I wrote a couple of weeks ago about having knee surgery. I'll spare the details; but the previous year took a toll. It started with a fall and a hematoma on my shin, then, I hurt my knee, etc. For nearly a year, there was little exercise. I gained a good 10 pounds, on top of 10 pounds too much that I already carried. I got flabby. I felt very unattractive and insecure about my body. I would try to tell myself -- hey, you look pretty good for a 61 year old. That was true -- I certainly dress well, have a good sense of presence and know how to conceal the pounds. But, I knew. I ranted about getting older and how it's not fair and how the body isn't what it used to be, etc.
What I didn't do, however, was take responsibility at that point for all that had happened to me - my fall, my injury, my weight gain, my eating habits, etc. I just made excuses and whined. I dated some, but wasn't in a long-term relationship and not having a lot (or when I was having it, it wasn't "great") sex -- so I would say, "Look, I hardly drink, I don't do drugs, I'm not having sex -- don't take my fu....ng FOOD away from me." It was my joke --- but I didn't admit it was my joke on myself.
After my knee surgery, my doctor said, "you have to lose weight". I cried and felt it was a daunting task -- even though it's about 20 - 25 pounds (as opposed to people "really" overweight.)
This morning, I read an article about Jamie Lee Curtis ( the actress). She's turning 50 and will be in AARP magazine soon. Here's a quote: "I want to be older," she tells the magazine. "I actually think there's an incredible amount of self-knowledge that comes with getting older. I feel way better now than I did when I was 20. I'm stronger, I'm smarter in every way, I'm so much less crazy than I was then."
I love what she says. She goes on to take responsibility for how she looks. I'm doing the same.
I have a new boyfriend. He's a couple of years older than me. He's thin, fit, trim, athletic, a great/ healthy eater. What an inspiration. He's attracted to me as I am AND he's open about wanting me to be healthier so I can live longer and maybe share a longer life with him. How cool is that.
For the first time, in a long time, I'm motivated about looking good BECAUSE it will mean I'm healthier. I love to look good -- always have. Like I said, I dress well, am sexy and desireable (with my clothes on) ... but, I've fooled myself too long.
I'll keep you informed of how I'm doing.
To start, I'm walking longer each day as my knee heals, I'm making much better food choices. But, most importantly, I'm not making excuses ... just taking action.
Point: We, and only we, are responsible for how we age. We can approach it with disgust OR we can be delighted about the mystery and adventure of aging and face it with delight. I choose the later.
Happy aging with Grace!
Labels: Aging, Boomers aging, health and wellness, Self-responsibility, Weight
posted by Ann Fry, Head Boomer at
9:00 AM
2 Comments:
Good inspirational post. Grace is not a term I'd apply to myself rounding the corner on 50 and dealing with this decade. The pounds are up, the BP is up, the mood is down as is..well other things. My MD is ranting at me to at least walk 30 min a day. Even that low level of strain has been a mountain in front of me. My packed gym bag has been laying fallow in the trunk of my car while I continue to make my monthly donation to the health club.
In essence, you are correct. I need to get off my ass and get going.
BTW, my wife and I were debating the age of Jamie Lee after seeing a recent commercial for some yogurt I think. To me she looked close to 60, my wife said younger. You on the other hand look 40-ish. Guess I could never be one of those "Guess Your Age" carnival hawkers...
I love your attitude! You're right... aging is all about us and how we choose to view it. You can focus on the wrinkles and the pounds or you can celebrate the heightened sense of self the years gift us with.
I'm feeling more self-confident than ever before and I'm expressing my views with clarity and conviction. There are few, if any, menopausal shrinking violets--we old dames can get pretty darn feisty!
Thanks for the great post!
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