Sometimes You Just Don't Know

Morning,
"Sometimes life comes at you fast." I heard those words on a funny commercial on TV. I know it's true. You can be bopping along, things can be great, and then, Wham (clap of your hands) ... things change on a dime.

Now, at the risk of sounding too "new age," according to astrologists, Mercury is in Retrograde. What the heck does that mean? Well, it means things are unpredictable and often it feels like you have little control over what happens around you. For example, a description of Mercury in Retrograde says: Businesses, travels and communications tend to experience delays and different problems. Computers and other processes that work with information may experience crashes, unexpected failures.Don't enroll in courses, don't buy expensive Mercurian items (books, cars, mobile phones etc.), don't sign important contracts and do not marry.
The descriptions online offer many "warnings." Well, I don't like to really buy into this thinking .... But, the last few days have been interesting.
1. Two emails that I absolutely sent were never received by the recipients AND they are no where to be found on my computer (would usually be in my SENT box). They disappeared. In one case -- not a bad thing. I sent an angry email and now I'm glad it wasn't received.
2. A huge contract I had coming up in June was cancelled -- just all of a sudden. It devastated me. They blamed it on "the economy" .. e.g. not enough registrants for this conference. And, interestingly, they had never signed my contract. As a speaker, I send a contract and insist on 1/2 down on my fee in advance. I was slack about it ... knew they were doing something new and innovative on a shoestring... so... I'm out.
3. My son thought he had a really good "gig" lined up and it just fell apart.

These are examples of how Mercury in Retrograde works. Expect the unexpected. It makes me sort of want to do nothing, withdraw, be fearful, but I know those strategies won't work.

So, what do you do? Well, with my thinking cap on, using my sense of humor and my best coaching skills, here are a few thoughts:
1. Use the time to regroup -- take time daily to rethink where you are, where you want to be and what you think some good steps might be --- BUT DON'T DO ANYTHING (until Mercury is out of Retrograde -- on June 19th) * By the way, the next retrograde is in September .... so DO things between June 19th and September 24th.
2. As you're regrouping -- do it in fun places -- walk outside, go to a park, ride a bicycle, have a glass of wine in a trendy bar and enjoy the "scenery."
3. Whenever anyone mentions the state of the economy -- thank them for sharing but DON'T BUY INTO IT. You don't want to focus your thinking on the negative thoughts of the economy ..... it doesn't have to effect you or be true at all if we keep our thoughts positive.
4. Spend time with friends and family ... having FUN. Give yourself some breaks and DON"T PUSH yourself too hard. Relax

So, life comes at you fast. You feel like you can't control it BUT, you CAN control your reaction to it.
Have a wonderful weekend.

Ann

A Trapeze experience

My good friend Judy spent her Mother's Day on a flying trapeze. I, was there to be proud, supportive and just to watch. Now, it's not that I was afraid ... I might actually do it someday. But, my purpose that day was to support her.
And now, for the rest of the story.
You know that I'm a boomer Adventurer -- moved cross country at 60, starting over, yada, yada, yada. Well, it's part of my purpose now to help other boomers engage in their stories.
Judy has had a couple of tough years -- you know, "sandwich generation" issues -- her elderly Mother was quite ill, then passed on -- a hard experience for Judy. Then her daughter, just a couple years out of college had some challenges .. but is doing fine. You know, it's always something.
Well Judy, one of my very, very best friends is ALWAYS there for me. When I'm having a hard time with the "starting over" part of my life .. I call her first. I talk, she listens, she talks, I listen, etc.
So, when she told me she wanted to talk a Flying Trapeze lesson for her 60th birthday celebration, I shouted "Yahoo... you go girl." The hardest part was finding a time to do it when I might also be able to fly into Austin to be there and I was really disappointed that I might not be able to.
Well, it all worked out. She planned it for Mother's Day weekend. My son, who still lives in Austin, had a CD Release party that weekend and, hooray -- I got to go for both.

It was exhilarating to watch Judy. The truth -- she has an "issue" with heights. But, she didn't let anything stop her. Shaking like a leaf (after only a 1/2 hour of instruction -- verbally), she climbed that ladder up to the very high platform... then, she grabbed that trapeze and she did exactly what they instructed her to do. Then, after others went, she did it again and then lastly, she climbed, grabbed the trapeze and jumped to the hands of the trainer on the next trapeze who caught her ... Wow!!
She continued shaking for 2 more hours.

Fortunately, we all went out to dinner together. She drank a bit of wine and I think the shaking subsided -- or at least she didn't notice it any more.
Now, what does this story have to do with anything?
Well, what adventures have you taken lately? What are you still yearning to do that you haven't done yet? When might you think about GOING FOR IT?!
Think about it, plan it, ask for support ... do it.Then, sit back and be so fu....ing proud of yourself for your accomplishment! Wow
Point: Don't die with your dreams still inside you AND don't NOT do what you've always dreamed of doing AND don't let anyone else stop you. Go for it NOW!

Congrats to Judy. Thank you for the privilege of letting me share this awesome experience with you. I'm so proud of you. Now, onward to whatever is next.
Happy dreaming and doing everyone.
Ann

Thoughts on Memorial Day

Good morning,
From where I sit and look out my window, it's a gorgeous day in New York City. The sun is shining and the temperature is perfect. Soon, I'll leave the inside for a walk along the Hudson River, 2 blocks from my apartment.
For others, today, it's a day of remembrance. Many served in various wars and many had their loved ones serve. And, we cannot deny the many who succumbed to the wars, including the present war. Their families will be honoring their losses today. And, for those who served and returned, they too will honor their experience.

As the "head boomer" ... born on the first day of the boomer generation, WWII was already over. I didn't know anyone who served in Korea, at least not to my knowledge; however, I knew people who served in Viet Nam. In fact, my college boyfriend was a medic. We wrote everyday for a year. Thankfully, he made it back, we broke up. Then, about 3 years ago, we found each other on the internet and have become friends. Interesting!

I'm not going to write here now of my opinions of war. Suffice it to say that I was a "typical" 60's generation person who protested, BUT, I was very conflicted. I was against the war in Viet Nam, but I wore a prisoner of war bracelet. Then, in the eearly 70's, I moved to Japan, compliments of the Dept. Of Defense Overseas Teaching Program and taught elementary and special education to military kids at Camp Zama . I had two wonderful years there. The interesting thing about Camp Zama was that it was the Army Headquarters for the region AND it housed the hospital where all severely wounded soldiers were sent to heal. I even dated some of those boys. Needless to say, I was very conflicted. I opposed the war, but supported the troops and I taught the children of many who served. In it's own way, all that influenced me to return back to the States and get my Social Work degree and then practice psychotherapy for 30 years. It was my way of dealing with human suffering, conflict and more.

So, while we all honor those lost today, we get in touch with how their sacrifice impacted our lives ... and maybe contributed to who we are today. For that, I lift my hat in thanks!

I intend to spend the day ... first walking outside, enjoying Nature. Then, I'll have a serendipitous day -- it's unplanned and I'll see where my walks take me.
I wish you the sort of day that will feed your soul, honor your loved ones and help you see all that you have and can be grateful for.
Ann

How Can I Be So Enlightened AND So Stupid at the Same Time?

Do you ever feel like you've done a lot of work on yourself -- that you're evolving, that you're spiritual, that you're on that road to enlightenment AND yet..... you make really stupid choices, behave in very non-enlightened ways, and feel you utterly suck at this whole growth thing?
Well, I do.

Over the last dozen or so years, I've made strides. I have good integrity, I take responsibility for my actions, I practice non-attachment (well some), I use the processes of intentionality and attraction. I'm a good person. It's been an arduous climb and one I'm very much still on. I've never felt that I mastered these ideals, but I feel I'm definitely on the journey. I also feel I have age and wisdom and experience on my side.

But then, life happens and I still react in old ways and cause lots of messiness in my relationships. I get dramatic, I judge (particularly myself), I whine, I get pessimistic and I doubt and question everything. What's a girl to do?

I suppose the clue here is: be gentle with myself ... know that as a human being I won't have it all together all the time. And, then, too, of course .... make better choices OR catch my poor choices earlier, as in more quickly. That would be a good one.

Point: Don't expect yourself to be perfect all the time. Do your best, love yourself, utilize your experiences to help you grow and know that everything, absolutely everything, is an opportunity to grow and learn and evolve.

From a practical standpoint ... this speaks to a sense of purpose and fulfillment. To best know yourself you need to be open to evolving and growing. Then, you'll be in a position to find what fulfills you, what gives you juice and how you want to spend the rest of your wild and crazy life. Happy searching boomers.

Funny How Life Is

Good Morning,
Well, I am back from traveling more .. in fact, a bunch. I'm exhausted. I've missed entering here and have lots to talk about.
I'll be back here much more often again.

My thoughts this morning are interesting. I ended my new relationship of 3 months. I thought it was going to be "it!" It wasn't. In fact, it was a challenge in an area I didn't expect. I thought I had mastered the art of being powerful and self-expressed. What I realized in the past few weeks was how much I still do what I used to do -- I gave up much of myself to be who he wanted me to be. Amazing. All this growth and progress I've made and I let it go to be with someone.

Well, not anymore. From this day forward, when I see myself shrinking back or trying to be someone for someone else ... I'm outta there. I remember when I divorced, I said to myself, "I'd rather be alone than continue to be in a relationship where I'm not appreciated or I can't be myself." Well, I don't want to be alone AND I'm not suggesting I want to dominate. I just want a mutually respectful relationship where we honor our differences and share our similarities and where we don't make each other wrong. Is that too much to ask for? I think not.

So, how many of you do what I did? I heard on GMA this morning that single women in this country are now 51% of the population. Unbelievable. Maybe we don't need relationship, but maybe we want relationship. I do. And, I'm fine on my own, and strong, and more.

Point: Love who you are, be who you are and don't let anyone else try to change you... unless you want to make some improvements and have support to do it. And, accept how funny life is in giving you incredible lessons to learn.

Have a glorious day. I'll be back soon.
Ann