From the Desk of the Head Boomer...

Time to be EXCITED about your life!

2009-08-12T11:37:00.002-04:00

Hi Everyone,
Wow, it's been a month since I last posted... I can't believe it. So much has happened and I've been so busy. Glad to be back sharing with you.

I hear from so many people, especially many who are aging, that they are still "settling" for mediocrity ... still living life as others expect them to. It makes me so sad. In my own "Pollyanna" way, I just want people to be happy and fulfilled. I want you to do whatever it takes to have the life you want.... AND, I know I can't make anyone take the steps. I can cheer you on, I can get you going, ask the questions, help you see who you can BE... but you have to do the work.

Question: Who do you want to BE?

Three weeks ago, I spent 4 days alone, in retreat, writing 3/4 of my new book about HOW TO ReInvent yourself. It was bliss .. to be away from my normal environment, writing daily ...and now I'm nearly done.
FYI: The new book is called: When You Want Things to be Different: 7 1/2 Steps to Transcend the Status Quo. YOu'll be thrilled with it.

After writing for 4 days, I went off on a Spiritual, meditation retreat .. to bliss out and relax. What a fabulous week.

POINT: I can do all this because I work for myself .. doing what I love. I make my own schedule, I don't get on a train or in a car and work elsewhere from 9-5. I'm so blessed. Perhaps, you can figure out how to create that sort of freedom for yourself!

To continue. The last 2 weeks, I've been a crazy person, putting together REInvention flyers for workshops in NY, in London and building my repertoire of offerings. (Yes, I do have to earn a living ... dont' have a trust fund.)

Now, here's what I really want to write about today. I got an email from my old business coach. He raised the question .... What are you excited about? And, he made the point that life is so much richer when you have things to look forward to.
I felt motivated to send him some of the things I'm exicted about right now in my life.
Here they are:

1. My last book came out in March. It's about my reinvention ... divorce, move to NYC, etc. It's called Sixty,Sexy, Sassy and Free: A Real Woman's Story of ReInvention.
It's a memoir and juicy. Read an excerpt at www.sixtysexysassyandfree.com
2. My next book is due out in September ... it's called: When You Want Things to be Different: 7 1/2 Steps to Transcend the Status Quo ..... it's the "how to" ReInvent.
3. I'm now positioned as the ReInvention Hotshot!... love it.
4. I'm speaking in Iowa in September, in NYC the next day and then doing a REInvention workshop in London on Sept. 29th.
5. My son's band (he's the lead singer) has found an "angel investor" ... they'll be crossing over into the bigtime this year. It's a miracle I produced by doing a FREE talk in Boston 2 years ago for a charity group ... met this man, hooked him up with Gabriel and now 2 years later it's come to this.
Check them out at: www.myspace.com/distantlightsmusic --- Gabe is the hunky cute one in front with the white shirt. So, I'm excited to be the Mother of a Rock Star.
6. I have so many new opportunities everyday and I live in NY having a blast. Life is Good... and I'm always excited.

Question: What are you excited about?

I'd love to hear from you.
Have a wonderful Summer day!
Hugs,
Ann

What's the Secret... Really ... About ReInvention?

2009-07-19T00:17:00.003-04:00

Hi Everyone,
On this beautiful Saturday in NYC, I took myself to a movie I've wanted to see. Movies are my therapy ... I go usually once a week or so. Today I chose the new Pixar animated movie... UP... in 3D.

First, 3D is a flashback to our youth. It seems it was on hiatus for a long time and is experiencing a resurgence. What fun.

So, UP is about an old man, who loses his wife, and takes on an adventure to fulfill on a dream they had together, but never accomplished. He attaches hundreds of balloons to his house, which pulls the house into the air .. and he sets of for a distant country to "restart" his life. Soon after takeoff, he finds that he has an "accidental stowaway"... a young boy. Together, they bond and the trip is awesome.

I love animated movies and usually find them much more for adults than kids. This is so in this case as well.

So, what does it have to do with ReInvention?
Here are some things that occur within the movie ... I was in tears, with the recognition of the process. Then, I'll tell you "the SECRET."
1. We are so locked into our past and our habits.. that we live inside of "always do things the same old way"
2. It often takes a threat from the outside (or a diagnosis, or someone leaving) to push us into something new.
3. We can't move forward with the weight of what we currently have ... we have to unload, clean out all the old stuff
4. There's a lot of uncertainty in starting over or reinventing ... you have to be willing to NOT know what's going to happen next or where you'll end up.
5. Your energy increases when you're headed in the "right" new direction.. it's almost like it reverses the aging process.

And, here's the kicker ... You have to be willing to LET GO! There's a scene in the movie where he tosses out all the contents of his house so it isn't weighed down and thus can fly and move forward. It's the letting go of the old, the unwanted, the un-needed.... then, there's room for what's new and different.

I implore you to see this movie. You'll see all the metaphors. Take your grandkids .. or just your friends, or yourself ... and experience what I'm talking about.
I couldn't have come up with a better metaphor. It had me reliving my life over the last few years ... and being proud of all I've accomplished.

Have a wonderful Sunday .. maybe even go to the movies.
Enjoy!
ann

How I Sabotage my Greatness ... and it Has to Stop!

2009-07-17T23:30:00.003-04:00

Hi Everyone,
I had quite an epiphany tonight and wanted to share it. It might sound like I'm bragging, and that's only to make a point.

Let's start at last night and lead to tonight.

Last night I had a date with a very attractive, age-appropriate, sexy man. It was out second date and it was delightful. We seemed to really enjoy each other. We went out for a drink, and then dinner.. and then needed to walk off the calories of the great burgers we ate. So, we walked along the Hudson River and Riverside Park on the Upper Westside. It was a gorgeous night... clear, moderate. It was romantic. We held hands, talked and periodically stopped for a nice, sexy, juicy kiss. Wow! Rockets were going off for both of us. (Now, not to fear ... we're not going to get provocative here... nothing more occurred in the realm of romantic behavior.)

Anyhow, as part of that walk and talk, I found myself "apologizing" to this man about ways I don't match up to him. He works out, rides his bike, swims ... has a really fit, thin, attractive body. Me, I'm a bit of slug lately, have put on a few extra pounds. I honestly was telling him about my lack of confidence in the way I look. He, of course, politely indicated that he wasn't concerned about that. He likes my look, thinks I'm sexy, etc. And, we have another date set up, so he must obviously be telling me the truth.

I'm sure that he sees much more to me than just my physicality. I, in typical "female" behavior, only saw how I look as my way of attracting him. Funny.

Now, here the rest of the story.

Tonight, I was asked to attend a 3-hour meeting for people I volunteer with. I wasn't excited about going. I could think of other more fun ways to spend a Friday night. However, I said I would go .. I gave my word I would attend. So, of course, I went. I decided that I would be open to getting something from being there.

The leader of the meeting wanted us to know that she wanted to empower us ... not just for the ways we serve the group, but for ourselves. She began talking about all the automatic ways we behave ... like how the little voice in our head often says things that disempower us .. and furthermore, how we often listen to that voice like it's the truth. She had us listen in for a bit.

My internal voice said things like: you're chubby, you're getting old, you're not at the top of your game, you're always wanting to be right, you're so reactive, etc, etc.

Then, she suggested that we are so much more than how we think of ourselves in our head ... and added, "But, the little voice will never stop." So, knowing we can always be sabotaged to the darkside ... how can we, instead, empower ourselves to be MORE? How can we acknowledge who we really are?

(Here's where the bragging and then the "aha" moment/ the epiphany comes in.)

As I looked at myself, I acknowledged all the great things: I'm beautiful (for my age), I'm extremely smart, well-spoken and accomplished. I'm well-educated, teach university level, speak all over the country to huge audiences, have coached and consulted in high-powered corporations. I've written two books and am working on another .. not to mention (lest we forget) that at age 60, I sold everything and moved to NY for a new adventure. Wow .. sounds cool!

So ... here's the insight. I allow the little voice that sees all the negatives to rule the amazing woman that I am. I forget how much I've achieved, how many people I've helped over the years (as a therapist, as a speaker, coach, etc.) How silly of me to focus on my 20 extra pounds, my not-perfect physicality?! Every man out there should be drooling over the amazing woman that I am.

And, the final step in the class tonight was to declare a new statement of what my life is dedicated to. Here's what I came up with: I am a strong, intelligent woman who's purpose in life is to lead and inspire .. authentically .. in every moment. When I write, when I speak in front of a room .. that's what people get. That's what they can count on me for.

As you can imagine, I left the class on a "high." I inspired myself.
By remembering this .. my image of myself will change on a dime.

Whatever had me, a rather sassy and unconventional woman, buy into the "skinny, sexy" look or the belief that that's all a man wants? Why did I sell out to that? (That's probably a whole different post.)

For now, I ask you ... Who are you .. I mean, really?
Can you learn to embrace yourself, love yourself ... all aspects of yourself?
I WILL ... from now on.

Thanks ... and as always, I'd love to hear from you.
Ann

Monday Morning Coaching Morsel

2009-07-12T21:44:00.003-04:00

Hi Everyone,
Each Monday morning, I send out a short inspirational message to start the week. My coaching clients, friends and a few others subscribe. I decided to post it here each week as well. Enjoy!

People never seem to stop amazing me. Sometimes it's a positive amazement ... like, how cool they are, how giving and generous and talented they are. But other times, it's how "uncool" and unhelpful they are. I have little to no patience for people that are merely self-serving, not -evolving. I think we all deserve to have a great life ... and the pollyanna in me thinks we might all want to be helpful to each other in the fulfillment of our desires. I suppose that, honestly, I have to evaluate myself here and take the inventory on how helpful and giving I am. I believe in the words of Gandhi:
"We must be the change we want to see in the world." Am I? How about you?
So, what do you see in this for yourself? Are you aware of when you are NOT being who you want the world to be? Are you also aware of the times when you are? When you find yourself being uncool or unhelpful, do you then go back and express that to the person who might have been a recipient of your behavior? Do you apologize? How do you feel in either case. It's all about self-awareness. In another quote by Gandhi: “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others."
Happy searching inside!

Coaching morsels are sent out every Monday... Just to inspire you a bit.

Enough Already! It’s Time to Show Up … and ReInvent Yourself!!!

2009-07-10T09:31:00.001-04:00

This is the reprint of an article I wrote recently ... thought you might like it.
enjoy!

Everyone is using the word REINVENTION. Many have told me not to use it because everyone else is using it. “It’s over-used” they say; or “it’s trite.”

Well, that might be true. I mean, it’s on TV when you watch the General Motors ads. I’ve seen it in the NY Times and the Wall Street Journal. Because things are different now, everyone is taking a stab at ReInventing…..

So, why am I using it?

Well, I’m very UNCONVENTIONAL. I tell it like it is. I call a dog a dog. I don’t call it a cute little, furry creature that yaps .. I call it a dog. I say it like it is. In the world of change, I call it change. No excuses, no explanations. Truth!!! I’m not being negative .. I’m just being honest.

Here’s a truth: THINGS ARE DIFFERENT. THEY WILL PROBABLY NEVER BE THE WAY THEY WERE. WHAT USED TO WORK NO LONGER DOES.

I feel like I need to shout it through a megaphone from the rooftops so you’ll hear me.

People are running around screaming, “the sky is falling.” Or, they’re doing the opposite and shoving their heads in the sand and pretending that everything is okay…just the way it was.

Here’s another truth: IF WHAT YOU USED TO DO IS NO LONGER WORKING … THEN IT’S TIME TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!!!

Companies that are dying do not know how to do things differently. They continue trying to stick a square peg in a square hole .. rather than creatively figuring out how to put a round peg in a square hole. They go back to the drawing board, analyzing why things might not be working, spin their wheels and then often DON”T do anything different.

The same is true for individuals. People are being laid off and then they’re immediately out there on the pavement looking for the next job … to do the same kind of work, only not realizing that there aren’t very many jobs. But, they have the “job” mentality.

Please don’t get me wrong. I know that we live in a society that requires us to earn money to pay bills, eat, have shelter. I know that money is the means to survival and for most individuals I know that the path to money is work. I also know that we all have different skill levels and often options are limited.

I also know, however, that many people have “settled” for what they think they know and what they’ve always done and can’t even see that there might be other options. They also, in their journey to survive, forget that life is about more than just going to work and earning a living. They’ve grown far away form some of their originating notions that included desire, passion and a search for fulfillment. They’ve taken to working in fields that their parents prescribed or that the universities told them would be secure. They stayed in these endeavors for many years while, often, secretly, yearning for something MORE or DIFFERENT.

All I want to do is to open the box, open the wrapping we’ve kept ourselves tied in with and start examining what else might be possible. If there are secret yearnings trying to jump out, then let’s look at them, examine what they’re made of, search for ways to maybe, just maybe, let them come forth.

I’m inviting you to WAKE UP …. Declare if you’ve had ENOUGH of the Status Quo or whatever else you want to call it. I’m inviting you to tap back into what you used to dream about being or having and see if it’s possible now.

My all time favorite childhood book is The Little Engine That Could. I especially like the part where he is pulling himself up the hill and declaring, “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can….” I think you CAN … at least take a peek, have some considerations.

Are you someone who sits and WAITS or someone who TAKES ACTION? Do you slide your toe in the cold water and slither down a bit at a time OR do you just jump in? Are you prone to do what others tell you to do or think you should do OR do you declare for yourself what direction you choose.

Are you ready to Re-energize, Re-generate, Re-purpose? Are you read to at least consider ReInventing? If so, I’ll show you how!
First … you have to:
1. Show Up,
2. Be Willing,
3. Give yourself permission

Then, you’re ready to Jump in and go through the 6 Step ReInvention Program.
Here’s the first two steps:

1. STOP doing what you no longer need to/ want to be doing.
Look all over your life, OR if thinking of work … look all over your workplace. You are wasting time and energy doing things that no longer work. You are distracting yourself with unnecessary activities. You’re also probably gossiping, wasting time and whining. STOP!

2. START doing what you want to be doing!
You’ve forgotten what’s really important to you AND you’ve stopped being true to yourself. It’s time to take your dreams back. First, sit down someplace quiet and make a list of everything you used to LOVE to do when you were a child, a teenager, a young adult … and yes, even now. All the things that are fulfilling and bring a smile or make your heart sing. All those old dreams that got shoved away and are sitting gathering dust in some old closet in the basement. Yes, look at them. Take them out. Remember …… Then, put the list away for a day or so and then go back and remember more.
Here are a few ideas: writing, painting, drawing, sledding, skiing, playing games, fencing, tennis, building things …. You get the picture. Remember them all.

Then, make a list of a few things you will START to do .. that are different from what you now do all day long.

That’s a good start. It will stir up the pot.

When you’re ready for more …. Let me know and I’ll be back with more steps … there are 4 more steps in the program, plus a couple of BONUS steps!

Enjoy the journey!

Ann Fry
ann@annfry.com
www.annfry.com
The Unconventional Speaker
The ReInvention Expert

4th of July and Other Ramblings from a Nice Weekend

2009-07-06T10:36:00.003-04:00

Good morning everyone,
Well, it's a week since my last post and it's a month since I started the bootcamp to regain control of my health and fitness. It's also been a holiday weekend... so there's a few things to share.

First, I've had a cold, cough and yuck for nearly two weeks now and I'm tired of it. It's kept me locked down and without enough energy ... thus somehow sabotaging my ability to walk and workout as much as I would like. However, I never, ever give up ... so tomorrow night, back to bootcamp with Joshua (http://www.mindovermatternyc.com) Joshua won't let me give up. By the way ... we are looking for a health journal that wants to follow our journey of getting this Head Boomer in shape. Send me any leads you might have.

Second, what a week. It started with rain, and rain and more rain ... and then, just in time turned into a gorgeous, sunny, temperate weekend. After being Vitamin D deprived, being outside felt like heaven ... and I didn't complain about the sun at all.

Third, it was a fabulous July 4th weekend. It started out early for me. I had a bunch of people over to my apartment on Wed. evening to have an old-fashioned pot luck dinner and Hootenanny (for those of you who might not remember .. that's a "sing along.") We belted out great songs with my friend Jackie serenading us on her guitar. Check out Jackie ... she's a pro...http://tinyurl.com/lsdjuf

Beginning with Friday, I had nearly 0 plans for the weekend. Nearly everyone I knew was fleeing NYC for the beach or someplace else. I thought, oh, it's gonna be a lonely weekend AND I'm feeling sick... you know the drill. But, of course, it was great.
I rested, I read, I went out for short walks. I saw two movies. I saw the current weeper, My Sister's Keeper (yes, I liked it, despite the reviews.) I saw HAIR ... playing at the Lincoln Center Walter Reade theater. What a treat... so reminiscent of our youth. We all sang along, clapped (like it was a live performance). Loved it.

I spent time with Patrick, my assistant. We walked along the Hudson River and ate burgers at the cafe at the 70th St. Pier. Yum.

I definitely saw NY fireworks for the very first time. It's always been on the East side... I've not had an opportunity to go in the past. But, this year, being the anniversary of the Hudson .. it was on the Westside. I went with 3 people and stood on the (closed off) Westside Highway ... near 72nd St. We had a clear, unobstructed view as we looked South. What an extravaganza.. Gorgeous fireworks. It was worth waiting for. I spent the fireworks time with 3 friends, drinking homemade sangria and eating chocolate cookies .. what's not to like about that. Oh, and I caught the fumes from the kids nearby who lit up a joint and passed it around amongst them. Wow!
Note: My only weird thought ... how many people could have been fed with the millions of dollars spent on fireworks that were over in a 1/2 hour? (However, I gave that up and just enjoyed.)

Lastly, some conclusions. It turned out to be just what I needed and wanted. It was a combination of down time (and yes, I did work a bit ... produced an article and some marketing material.) I rested, read, walked alone. And, it was a time with friends. I saw two movies (a favorite pasttime.) It was nostalgic. As I watched the fireworks, I remembered times from my youth and I remembered taking my son, Gabriel, to fireworks in Austin for many years. There they had the display over the river downtown, with the symphony playing. Awesome. And, I got to see NYC fireworks for the first time.

In all my years, I never tire of the display. I oooh and aaaah with the rest of the crowd. It takes me away from the normal and mundane. It was beautiful.

So, it's now Monday morning .. a new week, a new month. I'm up to doing a lot of stuff and using my Summer much as I did this weekend. I'll work a bit, I'll rest a bit, I'll read a bit, I'll write a bit (trying to finish the next book.)

Have a glorious time and I'll be back with you soon.
Hugs,
ann

Wow ... Life is So Vulnerable ... Savor the Moment

2009-06-30T16:23:00.003-04:00

Hi Everyone,
Well, I just returned from a quick weekend in Austin, TX. I went there to surprise one of my best friends for her 60th birthday party AND, as always, to spend some time with my son and friends who live there. It was a fabulous weekend ... well, mostly.

There is much to say about that visit and about what happened just before and just after.

Most of the time, I feel really young in spirit and attitude and in health. Sure, I have the perennial 20 pounds to lose, but overall, look and feel pretty darn good for age 63. However, some of the time, I feel ancient .... aches, pains, low endurance and mentally, well, feel like I suffer from CRS (can't remember sh-t!).

Let' me start at the beginning.
Well, actually, it was a tough start to the year. I lost my last brother. His name was Shelly, he was 74 and he died after a long battle with metastatic cancer. It was tough in the end. I miss him. He loved me unconditionally and was always there for me ... especially late at night when I just wanted to talk. Then, within weeks, I lost a "surrogate" Mother -- a woman I've known from my youth. She died of a heart attack on an airplane, on her way to Israel, from Miami.
Now, I suppose that as we age, we expect we'll lose more people. It's normal; but never easier. I lost many when I was young too and have never done well with death.

Anyhow, more recently, a friend (really an acquaintance) died suddenly of a heart attack. I'd seen him less than a week prior. It was a shock to us all. He was a great man, a benefactor, a loving husband, father, etc.

So you can see .... lots of death ... and then ... the day before I went to Austin, was the dual loss of Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson. Both boomers, both icons from my youth and young adulthood. Both too young. Farrah from cancer ... bravely; Michael from that which kills many celebrities ... drugs and hard living. No matter what people thought of Michael ... I always liked him and felt sorry for him. He was an unhappy man who never had a childhood, was awkward in his skin.. and yet so incredibly talented.

Message: We never know from one moment to the next what will be next. There is only the moment.

So, now to this past weekend. My friend was totally surprised by my presence and honored that I would fly in for her. I spent great time with my son and I saw my sister-in-law after not seeing her for 7 years (since my divorce.) While it was nice to see her, it was unsettling .. reminded me of much unpleasantness. She talked of the death of her husband, her sister .... lots of sadness.

I know I digress .. but I'm getting to a point here.

While in Austin, I developed a severe cold and dreaded flying home with plugged up ears and congested head. Ugh! I had two flights ... one to Chicago and then another to NY. I bought little ear screw in plugs to open the passages and it helped. But, about an hour into my first flight, I had an "incident." I tell you, with a little embarrassment ... but there's a point.

I was sitting in my seat. I felt myself overcome with something ... My body was fluttery, my hands shaking and numb, I was sweating and I could barely breathe. I headed to the restroom... thinking I might vomit. (Yes, I know this is graphic.) I didn't. I asked the flight attendant for water and juice and they let me sit in the rear jumpseat. They gave me a damp cloth to put on my head/neck. I was able to relax and I determined it was a panic attack (something I've experienced at other times in my life.) I eventually returned to my seat, slept and was fine.

While at Midway Airport in Chicago, I debated ... should I take the next flight or stay in a hotel overnight and relax? I decided I wanted to get home to my own bed. It was a good call. I didn't have another panic attack. I did have a lot of ear pain with this dumb cold... but I got home safe and sound. I went to bed immediately and slept for 10 hours.

Now, why do I write all this?
There's much.
These are tough times. I admit I have less business then I've had in years and am striving to figure out what else to do to create more. I'm 3 years in NY in my new home and although I have friends here, I'm not "as" close as I am to my lifetime friends who are elsewhere. I'm sort of "alone" in a big city. It's daunting at times.

Now, here's the point. NO MATTER WHAT ... I AM THRILLED TO HAVE RE=STARTED MY LIFE... I have NO regrets.

ReInvention is never easy .. it can be anxiety-producing. Stuff happens all around us .. some we can control, some we cannot. The important thing .. I NEVER give up .. I put one step in front of the other and I keep on trucking. I do what I know how to do. I network, I write, I promote. I know I'm here because I'm supposed to be AND I know I'll find my way in staying here and I'll figure out what my next steps are.

I could let the panic deter me. I could curl up and get under the covers. I could move back to Austin, even though I no longer love it there. But, I don't.

And now .. for you. What is it you want to really be doing in your life that you're willing to be anxious about and yet do anyhow?
As I often say... Aw, what the heck ... do it anyhow!

So, live life today to the richest level ever. Don't watch the news too much.. it's unpleasant and unsettling. Make sure you love those you choose to... and tell them so every time you speak to them.
Live the moment .. it's the only one you have.
Grow old with grace, take care of yourself as best you can.. but also make sure you laugh and have tons of fun along the way.

Thanks for letting me rant on. Yesterday was the first time I actually felt vulnerable .. like I could die on an airplane. I was in touch with my mortality. It was not fun AND, it was enlightening.
Now, it's about living... as fully as I can.

Have a great day.

Working Out, Dodging the Rain... and Keeping on Truckin

2009-06-24T10:08:00.003-04:00

So, I started my Boomer Boot Camp experience 3 weeks ago. So far, I'm sore, but progressing on the workout part; however, I'm still eating everything in site. My trainers are great, especially Joshua ... he is supportive, understanding and doesn't get rattled by the bitching and moaning of us "oldies." There's only 3 or 4 of us in the group and he's so patient. He asks what hurts and he suggests ways to tweak the exercises to do good and to still honor our aches and pains.

I'm analyzing my progress. First, I'm so angry at myself for being so out of shape. How did I let that happen? Second, I'm seeing the parts of my personality that are so disgusting .. the complaining and whining. Third, I'm really disgusted with how I'm eating and I realize why. Here's my rationalization: I hardly drink, I don't do drugs, I'm currently NOT having sex ... so "don't take away my food." My food is comfort for me at the moment. I mean, look, a girl's gotta have some pleasure in life, right... I mean some pleasure of a physical nature.

Now, perhaps there's a man out there who has something else to offer? Send me an email, a picture and some references and I'll consider it.
Hey, my sense of humor is always in tact!

And, if anyone knows a good health magazine that would be interested in this boomer ... from before to after ... getting fit, let me know. Joshua and I would love it. Remember to check him out at www.mindovermatternyc.com

So, I'll continue to keep you in the loop.

As for other things ... it's been raining for more than 30 days in NYC and yet it's predicted to continue for several more. I hate it. This is a walking city, so there's lots of walking through puddles, with umbrellas. But, the worst part: all the bad hair days. I am a total frizzhead these days.

If I ruled the world, it would rain at night when we're sleeping OR in the evening when we can snuggle up with a warm body and enjoy the romance of the falling rain.
I'm hoping Mother Nature will hear me on this.
The rain also gets me a bit depressed... I'm a sunshine woman and want to be outside, walking, lolligagging, etc.

I hope you all have a great rest of the week .. I'll be back soon.
Happy Summer wherever you are.
Ann

Nearly Two Weeks of Shaping up

2009-06-14T23:25:00.004-04:00

Well,
It's Sunday ... two days before the 2 week mark of my bootcamp workouts.
How am I doing? Not well. First, I haven't gained control of my eating yet. I'm still eating poorly ... well, not as badly as before, but still too much and still not all healthy.
Second, I'm walking a lot in between the workout... but probably not enough.
I'm walking around my apartment avoiding the mirror, feeling flabby and concerned that I'll never lose it. I'm wondering if I'll ever be thin again and all that goes along with that ... like, will I be attractive to men, will I ever feel confident about my body again? And, of course, will I be healthy?

I wonder if I'm becoming my Mother, who was heavy and never exercised or my older brother who died earlier this year ... very heavy and in bad shape. I don't want to copy this pattern.

I wonder what it will take for me to make this happen. Help???
I also wonder if my knee/leg hurting is related to the heavier body work I'm doing. That would be entirely unfair ... like, I finally start getting more physical and then I can't? Definitely not fair.

I think, well, if I was really in a relationship with a man... THEN I would be motivated to be thin. I know that's hogwash AND I also know that if a man is ONLY attracted to me for what I look like, I'd be insulted .. that would be small-minded. But, am I lying to myself? Sure, I definitely want to look good for a man.

I don't want to wait for a diagnosis of something that would then "demand" that I lose weight. I want to be proactive ... so again .. if anyone can help me with this, please......

Actually, I see this is a pattern in my life... it goes like this: Why is it that I don't do what I know I should do to get the results I want? It's a sabotage thing. Well, there you have it .. I'm not perfect.

I'd love your comments.
And, remember, I never, ever, ever give up ... so keep tuned.
Have a great week.
ann

Check out Joshua at www.mindovermatternyc.com

It's been a Week and a Day

2009-06-11T00:49:00.004-04:00

Hi all,
Boy do I hurt. Yesterday was one week since I started my fitness routine and I gotta say ... I'm really hurting.

I walked to Central Park at 6:00 last night for my 6:30 workout. She worked us really hard and by the end, I was in agony .. my knee hurt, my feet hurt, my chest hurt. I practically limped home. Well, first I stopped at the grocery store to get some protein for dinner, came upstairs, took off my workout clothes and sneakers. My knee was blown up, so needed ice... with helped.

I awoke this morning and pumped myself full with Motrin and Glucosomine ... I mean, look, I knew I was going dancing tonight and a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. And, to make it worse, I had plans to go to IKEA today and I knew that meant at least a couple of hours on my feet on a concrete floor ... then, dancing.

I might not be losing weight yet, I might be bitching and moaning and complaining ... but no matter what, I will continue.
Yes, I did go to IKEA ... the meds kicked in, so no problem.
I did go dancing ... forgot to take more meds and wow... didn't take long for the knee to swell up and my legs to ache. I did, not, however let that stopped me .. I kept on dancing. then, of course, I had to walk home.

It's late, I'm ready to go to bed and will take my ice pack into the bed with me.

Yes, it sounds like all I'm doing is complaining ... but the truth is...it's just a form of expression. And, the one thing you should all know about me is that I don't give up. I know I'll turn a corner (soon I hope) where I'm happy about working out. I'll start to see some results to reinforce it. I'll be dancing the "yahoo" dance where I'm excited and celebrating my looking good.

Keep tuned. Tomorrow I'll have time for a nice walk along the Hudson (unless it pours).

In other news ... I had my fourth date with a great guy. He's the one I went dancing with and to IKEA .... and he likes me. that's cool!!

Have a great couple of days.
Ann

Day 5 .... Getting Fit

2009-06-08T00:10:00.004-04:00

Happy end of weekend,
Well, I went to my second bootcamp yesterday morning at Central Park. It was really tough. I did as much as I could and I limped home...my arthritic knee feeling the results of too much fitness. What can I say ... I'm not 25.. I'm 63. My body doesn't do all those things that many younger then me can do.

I don't bend, fold or contort that well. And, I breathe really hard when trying to run up and down the stairs at the Fountain in Central Park ... not to mention the push ups, etc. But, the important thing here .. I AM taking it on!!!

I followed up with eating everything in site ... burger, fries, chocolate cookies .. and that's after committing to my health counselor that I would change my eating habits.
What always happens when I commit to changing my food regimen is that I immediately go into deprivation ... I know the things I love will be removed from the OKAY list So I crave them more than ever. It's like a squirrel gathering his acorns ... just in case there won't be enough for the Winter .. only with me .. I eat it all, in ALL seasons!

My excuse: I don't do drugs, I hardly drink, I'm NOT having sex these days ... so DON'T take away my food. I mean, a girl's got to have some pleasure in life.

So, what to do?
I finally went to the grocery store today. I bought fruit, veges, healthy 7grain bread, and all the rest of the recommended foods. I stocked up. Now, the trick ... eat what's in my frig rather than eating poorer choices in restaurants.

Wish me well.

Meanwhile, I walked all over this city and I thought positive thoughts ... "I'm sexy, I'm happy, I'm open to being in love, I'm great, I'm successful, etc." I must admit the little hop in my step was greater with these thoughts.

So, I invite you to take on yourself ... commit to whatever you want to achieve.
Let's do it together.
Remember, I'm doing it with Joshua .... www.mindovermatternyc.com
Happy New week!!!
Thanks,
Ann

Day 4 ... and other news

2009-06-05T12:39:00.003-04:00

Hi Everyone,
Well, it's 4 days since I committed to getting more fit and losing weight. How am I doing?

I had a very busy day yesterday ... early morning networking event, then a looong walk from that venue to Grand Central station to meet up for my next meeting. Then, a train back up town and a long walk to meet yet another person. Lots of street walking, but it was a beautiful day. I ate well early in the day, but sort of blew it later. I had a fundraising event, with great "starters" and brownies and a glass of wine. What can I say? Mea culpa! Then, a dinner date ... more, what can I say?

The biggest challenge for me is the eating out and being social. I never have more than a glass of white wine and I make fairly decent choices, but I know I could be much better.

I'll go to a bootcamp in the morning and that will be great... and the eating thing, well that will develop a bit more slowly as I begin to choose more wisely.

Meanwhile, I want you to know about Joshua ... he's young and fit and committed to helping "mature" people with his boomer bootcamps in Central Park, so if you live in NY, check him out. www.mindovermatternyc.com

On a sad note, a friend died suddenly of a heart attack and I'm heart sick. I fear I'm getting to the age where that will begin to happen more readily ... a motivator, for sure, to get healthier AND to live a life of fulfillment.

What will you choose today to live a more healthy and fulfilled life?

Have an awesome Friday, wherever you are.

Thanks,
Ann

Day 2 of Getting Fit -- Ouch

2009-06-03T23:35:00.003-04:00

Hi All,
Well, last night was the night I had my first workout at the bootcamp. It was really great and I felt very proud of myself.
I woke up this morning and barely felt any pain. it was my intention to go dancing tonight and get some momentum on this workout thing. But, the rain was awful, I was tired, so day 2... I was a slug.

Now, I have to report, that at 11:30 p.m. (about 28 hours after completing the workout) I HURT. MY muscles that spread across my chest from one armpit to the other .. wow! And, my calves. As long as I don't have to raise my arms, I'm fine. I'm going to go to bed early.

My trainer, Joshua, is excited to see how I do. As of this moment, I'm not happy with him. I mean, I never like those that hurt me. :) Seriously, he's excited to take me on and to see my progress.

Today I also agreed to start watching my diet. I had a session with a health counselor and agreed to start keeping a food diary tomorrow. I also agreed NOT to lie. So, I guess I'll have to either eat well so I feel good about telling the truth OR, I'll have to bear the burden of disclosing my putrid eating habits. Guess I'll see what comes out. Of course, I'll be starting that first day with a breakfast networking deal, a coffee business meeting, a fund-raising event at 6:00 and then a dinner date at 8:00. I'll be interested to see how I do. Cross your fingers for me that I'll make some good choices ...

Other than the getting healthy deal ... there's always the news. But, since I rarely read or listen to the news these days, I have little to react to.

Sad about the "lost" airplane that blew up. Seems there's more to this one then we see.
There's the story coming out tomorrow about Bernie Madoff's sons and their continued statements of knowing nothing. We'll see.
Conan O'Brien is doing night 3 as the new Tonight Show host.

Thaaaaat's all folks.
Have a great sleep.

Okay ... so I'm Taking it on ... My Fitness ... Ugh!

2009-06-02T23:46:00.003-04:00

Hi Everyone,
So, for months I've been bitching and moaning about how chunky/ chubby I'm getting. And, of course that's all I've been doing. I haven't been taking any real action to change that concern. Well, I have taken action in the realm of eating ... but in the opposite way ... eating way too much.

But, I let me digress. About 14 months ago, I had knee surgery. It fixed the tear, which was great news. I was now able to walk much better, and without a lot of pain. While there was some residual arthritis, I was really motivated to get stronger and more fit. So, last Summer I was committed. I started walking .. a lot, not just city walking here in NYC, but speed walking along the Hudson River in Riverside Park. I also started eating in a more healthy way. Result: I lost 10 pounds and I felt sexier and healthier and had a lot more energy. That lasted from last March/April through the end of November. Then, along came holidays ... and Winter.

Suffice it to say, I ate too much, walked too little and have now noticed that I added that 10 pounds I lost back on, plus a couple more. Ugh!!! I feel sluggish, really chubby and don't have a lot of confidence about my sexual attractiveness because of it.

Now, back to the purpose here: I got an email about a Boot Camp for boomers that started tonight. Yup, every Tuesday night, along with other baby boomers here in Manhattan, we're meeting at the beautiful fountain in Central Park and participating in an excruciating hour of upper, lower body exercises plus lots of aerobic walks around the fountain in-between. It's killer and I know it will make a difference for me.

Now, for me to get to Central Park first is about a 25 minute walk ... then the one hour workout and then 25 minutes back. That's a lot. I worked muscles I didn't know I had ... and then some. I'm very confident that I will hate Joshua in the morning when I find it difficult to get out of bed. Now, it's nearly midnight and the pain hasn't set in yet, but he definitely promised us that it WILL show up.

I'm going to blog several times a week about this new adventure I've taken on .. The Bootcamp that will turn this 63 year old into a gorgeous, sexy creature so that men will be crawling all over me.

My previous excuse... "I don't do drugs, I hardly drink, I'm NOT having sex ... so don't take my food away from me"... will no longer work. In other words, I'll replace exercise as something pleasureable (granted that will take a bit of time) ... But, I'll have the hope that someday I'll have a sexy body once again ... sex-worthy .. and the need to eat will Go AWAY.

Keep tuned.I'll be tracking my progress with pictures and videos.
If you want more information (and if you live in NY) join me. Check Joshua out here: www.mindovermatternyc.com
Thanks
Ann

Sunday in New York

2009-05-31T16:42:00.004-04:00

Happy Sunday,
I was gone from NY for 2 weeks, and have now been back for 4 days. I love being back. NY is amazing.

I moved here 3 years ago to appreciate what this city has to offer and the Summer is the time to be here .. for many reasons. 1. There are lots of free things to do outside -- concerts, fairs, carnivals, parks. 2. Many people who live here go away weekends to their summer homes, leaving the city less crowded (except for the tourists.) 3. I have the privilege of living between the two greatest parks that I walk in -- 3 blocks from Central Park and 2 blocks from Riverside Park (my favorite) which goes along the Hudson River, with Jersey across the water ... and connecting all the way down to Battery Park at the tip of Manhattan. 4. All the wonderful cafes where we can sit outside and drink wine or eat a great meal ... and watch people. 5. $6.00 movies every Friday, Sat. or Sun morning before noon -- what a bargain.

While I was at my conference in San Francisco, I hardly left the hotel. While I was in Austin, I did enjoy outside cafes, but it was already boiling hot and to walk someplace interesting, I had to get in my car and drive a distance.

Why do I share this? Well, life is what you make it. I suggest you live where you want to live. As a boomer, perhaps you've created some of the freedom to be able to live the life you want OR perhaps you're ready to start planning it for the near future.
There is no reason to stay where you're now living UNLESS it is where you choose to live.

Much of life is lived as a default. We're born someplace, to a certain set of parents and a lifestyle. Many stay put. They live where they've always been, they work in the arena of what that place offers or in the "family" business. Many do not stretch beyond the familiar.

Many of you know that one of my favorite sayings is: "don't die with your dreams still inside you." So, if you're longing for something different, make sure you begin to create it as a possibility in the upcoming years. Life is meant to be lived full-out. Sometimes, we don't move forward because we think we need to stay for the sake of the kids or the grandkids .. well, you know what, that's just not so. Ask yourself this: Do I want my kids to settle for a mediocre life (like I did) or do I want them to live a rich, full, exciting life filled with fulfillment?

When I decided to leave Austin, TX to move to NYC, my son said, "you go for it, Mom." He encouraged me. He knew that airplanes, and computers and cell phones can keep us connected -- and they do. We have an even richer relationship because we are both where we want to be. And, I'm proud to be able to set the example for him ... I don't ever want him to just "settle."

So, what will you do today to plan your life as you'd like it to be?
Let me know if I can help.
As always, I'd love your comments.

Happy Sunday.
Ann

I'm Flabbergasted AND I'm Inspired

2009-05-27T11:32:00.003-04:00

Cheers from Austin, TX, where I've been for the last 9 days ... part work, part vacation. Before that, I was in San Francisco for 4 days, but more about that in a moment.

So, I've just spent 9 days in the city that I lived in for 20 years and have been gone from for 3 years. I come here often, for clients, but most importantly, to visit my son and my friends. I love it here, well, except for the hot weather and humidity and traffic. It's beautiful and relaxing.

While here, I had several events to help launch my book and my new directions. I invited literally hundreds of people -- to a private party to celebrate, to a workshop on ReInventing and to an "official" book signing event at a local, independent bookstore. The workshop was a success -- 7 wonderful women came together to explore where they are in their lives and where they still hope to go. There were tears and there was laughter and there was a palpable sense of "wow"... so many possibilities and there was "oh, my God, how can I ever have that?" They bonded in under 5 hours and will continue to support each other. It was so gratifying to be part of that experience.
One woman signed up and then called that day to say her husband wanted her to stay home and help him work on the roof. So, she didn't come, even after signing up with a sense of urgency and desperation and a comment of "I have no passion in my life." Go figure.

The other events is what flabbergasted me. I have so many friends here and I really wanted to see them and share my excitement ... hardly anyone came to either event. I was hurt, disappointed and it triggered my issues of "nobody likes me" "everyone forgets me or rejects me" "what I'm doing isn't important." Amazing how quickly I can take it personally and feel small and insignificant.

Now, compare that with why I was in San Francisco: I attend the final weekend of a year-long course called Power & Contribution AND a Conference for Global Transformation. There were people there (like over 500) from all over the world. I've been in a class with 150 of them all year. Each of us has taken on a promise to change the world in some significant way and to devote our lives to that cause.

My Promise: By the year 2025, all people will be "reinventing" themselves for happiness and fulfillment and be inspired to make a difference in the world."

So, imagine .. I go to a global conference, I'm working to inspire people to take on FULFILLMENT in their lives and then I come to Austin and hardly anyone comes to see me and celebrate my launching of my book and my promise. That's the context. Now, here's the "what I see"/ the points of understanding:

1. People do what they do, and it has nothing to do with me -- so stop taking it personally. Sometimes people can't be with the excitement and celebration of others, especially if they are not excited and happy on their own.
2. As I move forward to have a global impact, I must realize that many (make that MOST) people will not be interested .. it's part of the challenge.
3. I need to get ahold of myself and stop being so sensitive and keep focused on what's really important to me. And, stop distracting myself with insignificant things and stop "settling" for less than what I deserve.
4. Never give up!!! When what you are about is important to you ... NEVER, ever, give up.

My message to you this day Boomers -- go after life with gusto, don't let what people think of you have any negative impact on you and keep taking one step after another.

Have a glorious week.
Ann

An "Accidental" Life

2009-05-04T08:54:00.004-04:00

Good morning and Happy May,
I've been sooooo busy that I haven't entered anything in this blog in 2 weeks. Ouch.
So, I'm here to make up for lost time and ramble a bit.

First, I just completely burned and destroyed the hard-boiled eggs I was trying to boil. I often do that. I put them in a pot of water and then leave them on the stove ... and proceed to forget...until I hear this weird "popping" noise in the kitchen. Then I find them popped instead of boiled. Gross. I might as well throw the money in the garbage can rather than buy and waste the eggs. Now, why does this happen? Because I don't cook very much anymore -- been there, done that. And second, because I'm preoccupied.

Second, I'm sick of the news. Truthfully, I hardly turn on the TV. At age 63, more than 1/2 way through my life, I don't want to be scared to death every day. I'd rather live in lala land, with my head in the sand.

Third, I'm working as fast and as hard as I can ... just to create new opportunities for work AND to keep myself occupied. Don't know about you, but the economy is hitting many independents just as hard as those being laid off... and we don't have the benefit of unemployment compensation.

Fourth, I'm on a very strict 3-week food plan/ a nice way to say "diet." Yes, the dreaded "diet." I can't eat sugar, dairy, bread, rice, pasta, ketchup, vinegar... anything that creates mold or yeast. It's boring, challenging and so far, after 9 days, I haven't lost a pound and I'm feeling deprived. I'm craving popcorn, cokes, wine and chocolate, of course. Now, why am I doing this? Well, first, honestly, to be healthier ... need to definitely lose 20 to 25 pounds. But, there's more. As this 60+ single, boomer woman ... I want to be THIN ... so that men will be attracted to me. Is that sickening or what. You've heard me rant about this before. There's not a profile on Match.com where these men (often a bit overweight themselves) are demanding that their match be thin and fit (and being 30 would help too.) So, in my efforts to have companionship (well, that's one way of putting it)... I think I have to be thinner so that they will find me attractive. Besides, there's no way I'm getting into any kind of intimate relationship with a flabby body like this. And, if it would only stop raining and going back and forth to Winter weather, I'd get out there an start walking long distances to firm up that flab. Okay, enough about this one.

Fifth, and this is the one I really wanted to write about: The Accidental Life....
I do some work with clients in corporate America. I'm seeing many people, because of the layoff situation .. becoming Accidental Managers. What I mean is... they're working along, doing a good job, their boss gets the axe, they get asked to "step up" into that management position ... and voila.. they're a manager. And, they know not what to do!!! Well, many of us in our lives are being called into an accidental life. We had work coming in ... and don't now, so we're scrambling .. trying to figure out what to do to make money. We used to have some money to spend for extras and things we enjoyed... and well, we're down by double-digit percentages and we're accidentally now figuring out how to have fun without money. We've fallen into a "default" life and trying to fight our way out of a brown paper bag.

So, let's reframe that for a moment. Remember, I'm the head boomer -- old, wise, knowledgeable .. so they think. I can figure it out. When you have lemons, make lemonade, right?
So, when something unexpected befalls you, how do you react to it proactively and not be a victim of the Accidental Life? Easy: First, you cry.. if that's your nature? Second, you do an internal examination, remembering how you've coped in the past when things didn't go your way. Third, you "reinvent" your way of being. Example: Go through your closet and start a new image with what you have .. get funky, or more or less stylish, change your hairstyle (men, shave off or grow a mustache), be more or less colorful. Another example: Do the opposite of what you normally do. If you immediately get up and go on a rampage to find work .. then, instead, sit quietly and meditate or go for a walk... then come back and work. Or, if you find yourself complaining a lot (like I often do) then don't let anything negative come out of your mouth... demand only positive thoughts and words from yourself.

You get the point? Things might appear to happen "accidentally" and we all know we can't always control what happens... BUT, we can control how we react to it or handle it. Handle it with grace and ease and fun and laughter, being practical where you can and throw the rest up at the ceiling and see what sticks.

See the "accidental" as "serendipity" ... see what happens. Ride it out.
Have a lovely week.
Ann

Monday Morning Coaching Morsel

2009-04-20T08:37:00.004-04:00

Hello Everyone,
Every Monday morning (and often it goes out on Sunday night), I send out a "morsel" of coaching .. a short something to think about ... to all my coaching clients, and now to you. I've also invited folks from twitter and facebook to read it. I've been doing it for years and found that people like starting their week this way. So, here is the installment for this week:

I had an experience today of being in a training event that was amazing. The topic focused mostly on the language we use .. no, not like the cussing or anything like that. It talked about what comes out of our mouths and how that creates our reality and outcomes in the world. Many of us know of intentional thinking and attraction and those models, but this is more about adult language. With everything we say, we're creating how we feel, what we do, how we relate to others, what does and doesn't happen ... and most importantly, we're creating our attitude.

Think about what you say. Is it proactive and upbeat or is it filled with things like how broke you are, or how fearful you are or how untrusting you are or how bad someone is, etc? Is your language filled with "what's wrong and not working" or is it filled with how positive things are, what you have to be grateful for, how wonderful the people in your life are? You might try keeping a journal of your thoughts and words ... and you might be surprised at what's going on inside that head of yours. You might be pushing away the possibilities and missing out. Take some time to reflect upon it all.
My wish for you ... to have happiness, joy and whatever you want ... and the facility to create it at will.

Have a great week,
ann

Wake up and Smell the Roses

2009-04-15T16:11:00.003-04:00

Hello there,
I've just watched a you tube video that brought tears to my eyes. As I explain and then send you to the link you'll certainly understand.

My friend sent me this link and just said to watch it. And I did, and I was.
What we see is a 47 year old woman making her stage debut on England's version of American Idol. The panel looks at her with humor and cynacism and expects her to be some sort of crazy woman. Then, she begins to sing and we are mesmerized.

As I watched, I wept ... for all the boomers ... and for all of everyone ... who has a dream and suppresses it. This woman struts out onstage and says, "I'm going to make that audience watch." She belts it out and you see the look of shock across the faces of Simon and his panel.

Many of you who know me, know that in my heart.. all I want is for people to feel passion and go for fulfillment. We all have talent, knowledge and dreams that are bursting to come forth.

I watched the video tonight after speaking to a professional group this afternoon. The name of the group doesn't matter. What does matter is that I hit a homerun. I know that as I walked that stage, making them laugh, getting them to think...that I got through. Following my speech there was a reception. Many people approached me with kind words. They told me that I made them think .. about things they want. One young woman sat down with me and for about 20 minutes told me how much she wants to move to Italy. Another person told me of her reinvention from one place to another and how she found love. All of my conversations led me to remember what life is really about: it's about creating life as you want it .. going for the gold, finding passion.

I know I sound redundant. I just can't help it. I'm excited. I'm also frustrated because when I run my workshops, I have a hard time attracting enough people. When I try to sell my book about my own reinvention ... few people buy it. I don't know how to break through to the masses and wake them up. How do I tell people to stop settling for less? How do I encourage them to go after life with zest?

That's my dilemma. I thank Susan Boyle for going after her desire.

(Go here to see the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY )

I'm so grateful I've been able to go after my dream. Now, what about the rest of you? Can I challenge you to take a few steps towards something new? What will it take?

Please ... wake up, smell the roses and go for it.
Ann

Be Inspired

2009-04-14T23:42:00.008-04:00

Hello there,
I've just watched a YouTube video that brought tears to my eyes. As I explain and then send you to the link you'll certainly understand.

My friend sent me this link and just said to watch it. And I did, and I was. What we see is a 47-year-old woman making her stage debut on England's version of American Idol. The panel looks at her with humor and cynicism and expects her to be some sort of crazy woman. Then, she begins to sing and we are mesmerized.

As I watched, I wept ... for all the boomers ... and for all of everyone ... who have a dream and suppress it. This woman struts out onstage and says, "I'm going to make that audience watch." She belts it out and you see the look of shock across the faces of Simon and his panel.

Many of you who know me, know that in my heart ... all I want is for people to feel passion and go for fulfillment. We all have talent, knowledge and dreams that are bursting to come forth.

I watched the video tonight after speaking to a professional group this afternoon. The name of the group doesn't matter. What does matter is that I hit a homerun. I know that as I walked that stage, making them laugh, getting them to think ... that I got through. Following my speech there was a reception. Many people approached me with kind words. They told me that I made them think ... about things they want. One young woman sat down with me and for about 20 minutes told me how much she wants to move to Italy. Another person told me of her reinvention from one place to another and how she found love. All of my conversations led me to remember what life is really about: it's about creating life as you want it ... going for the gold, finding passion.

I know I sound redundant. I just can't help it. I'm excited. I'm also frustrated because when I run my workshops, I have a hard time attracting enough people. When I try to sell my book about my own reinvention ... few people buy it. I don't know how to break through to the masses and wake them up. How do I tell people to stop settling for less? How do I encourage them to go after life with zest?

That's my dilemma. I thank Susan Boyle for going after her desire. (Go here to see the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY ) I'm so grateful I've been able to go after my dream. Now, what about the rest of you? Can I challenge you to take a few steps towards something new? What will it take?

Please ... wake up, smell the roses and go for it.
Ann

Wow, What Have I Been Up To

2009-04-04T17:00:00.002-04:00

I can't believe it ... I haven't made an entry in about 3 weeks. 20 lashes with a wet noodle. Remember that saying .. it's makes me feel like I"m 16.

I've been out of commission. I'm so sorry. I was traveling for 11 days .. to San Francisco, Denver and then Reno, NV and then back home in NYC for the past 5 days.
I was busy, overwhelmed, jet-lagged.

And, now I'm back in commission, ready to rock and roll and take on life.
Here are some random thoughts.

1. I loved going to San Fran for this great seminar I take .. it's about making a huge promise for the world. My promise: That all people as they age find passion, courage, fun and fulfillment and use that as a catalyst for action for making a difference in the world.
All of my work is committed to this promise and sets forth my agenda for the rest of my life. It's exciting.

2. I spent a couple of days with my niece and her husband in Denver. I loved being with them and the time was short. I ended up leaving early to go to Reno because of a huge snowstorm moving into Denver. Point: Somethings just can't be controlled.

3. I went to Reno to be the opening speaker at a Baby Boomer Festival. While it was exciting, it turned out to be a "bust." Hardly anyone attended. I was disappointed. However, I'm sure a few people were moved and inspired by my talk and will hopefully begin to shift their priorities for their lives. I made up a new saying: Make the REST of your life, the BEST of your life.

4. Since returning to NYC, the weather has gone from upper 60's and sitting outside to low 30's and windy. No wonder we all walk around sick. It's so windy today that it's hard to even walk.

5. I'm feeling frustrated and challenged as to how to get people to buy my book. I'm open to all ideas for making that happen. I know there are at least 30-40% of those 77 million boomers who could benefit.

6. I'm feeling anxious and worried about the economy; however, I'm eternally optimistic. The challenge of being self-employed with no real safety net creeps into my consciousness.

So, that's it for a windy, cold Saturday afternoon in NYC. Just wanted to make an entry.
Let me know what's on your mind.
ann

A Really Special Day ... Another Milestone

2009-03-18T01:23:00.003-04:00

Hi Everyone,
Well, even though it's after midnight in NYC while I write this, please pretend that it is still March 17th... Saint Patrick's Day. This is important, NOT because I'm Irish... I'm not and not because we wear green today .. I'm NOT.. .I'm in my pajamas actually and there's no green. What makes this day important is ... drumroll here. It's my 3rd Anniversary. I moved to NYC 3 years ago today. Yes, I rolled over the George Washington Bridge around 9:30 in the morning on March 17th, 2006. I was crying, my son was driving and the cats were yowling in the back of the van.

Here's the backdrop of the story. I left Austin, TX on March 14th, in a van loaded with 2 cats, my computer, printer, small desk, a couple of suitcases packed with clothes and whatever I could fit in the back. My son, Gabriel, was driving. We had an adventure of driving cross-country together. It was like Gabe was taking Mom to college. Yes, he was bringing me to NYC to live, which was the fulfillment of a life-long dream. Now, he, of course, was thrilled that Mom would have an apt. in NYC; he wasn't even thinking he might miss Mom on a regular basis. I mean, truly, do you think that even entered his mind?

So, here I was, 3 years ago, naive, soft-skinned, "nice." And, here I am after 3 years in NYC. I'm definitely more "on top" of my experiences and I don't fall for every Tom, Dick and Harry/ I'm more tough-skinned emotionally and my skin is flaky as hell from Winter. And, well, let's just say, "I've been working to develop my 'inner bitch'.. becoming much more assertive and not so nice. Wow, I have a great deal to be proud of.

Point: I followed my dream. I moved at age 60 to where I've always want to live... and I'm thrilled and I love it.

There's much more to the story. You can read it ALL if you order my new book. Read about it here: http://www.sixtysexysassyandfree.com

So, that's it for now. It's waaaay past my bedtime and I'll be wiped out in the morning if I don't get some sleep.
Thanks for sharing this with me.
Sleep well.
ann

A Milestone Day

2009-03-09T23:40:00.004-04:00

Greetings,
Wow .. this was really a special day for me.
First, my book finally arrived .. it's done, on sale, out there.
Second, I took myself out for dinner ... at a nice restaurant. Let me explain.

I'm quite successful. I travel all over, I speak at conferences in front of hundreds of people, I've written two books; BUT, I have a hard time taking myself out to dinner alone. Funny, huh?

I can go out to breakfast or lunch on my own and even out to dinner at a salad joint or diner; but to go to a "real" restaurant is a problem. Why? Usually, there are couples and groups eating out in restaurants. You don't see too many people on their own. So, it feels lonely and I wonder what people think about me when they see me sitting alone. Of course, they're probably not thinking about me at all, but rather, are engaged in conversation with whomever they are with. But, in my imagination, I think they're wondering... "Gee, she must be a loser, or poor thing -- she's alone, or she probably doesn't date, etc." Weird. NO, I"m not a loser and I'm not a poor thing.. and I do date; but I don't always have a date or a friend to go with and sometimes I just want a good meal out. At those times, instead, I usually order in (in NYC anyone delivers) or buy something prepared from a local grocery.

Tonight, however, I wanted to celebrate receiving boxes of my book. My new book: Sixty, Sexy, Sassy and Free: A Real Woman's Story of ReInvention is about a brave woman starting over at age 60.(Go here: http://tinyurl.com/bn62hh) Notice it doesn't say in the title: "she can't go out to dinner alone."

So, I walked across the street to a great, trendy restaurant, sat at the bar, ordered a glass of Proseco. I've been there for a drink a couple of times and the bartender remembered me. I told him I was celebrating. He congratulated me. I was only going to have a drink and maybe an appetizer. But, I said, "aw what the heck ..." and I ordered dinner. Okay, I did eat it at the bar, not at a table ... but still .. I conquered the issue. And, I'm all the better for it.

So, I ask you .. what do you have to overcome? What new chance do you need to / want to take? I invite you to take the step and do it.

So, indeed, it was a milestone day. I received the finished copies of a book I've worked on for 3 years AND I ate dinner alone at a trendy restaurant.
I'm a boomer who takes risks and shares that with the world to encourage them to do the same.

Thanks for checking in.
Have a good night.
Ann

Don't Panic ... Just Think and Do Something Different

2009-03-04T15:36:00.002-05:00

Hi Everyone,
Hear me out ... "we're gonna be okay." We absolutely need to join the revolution that says not to be consumed by the negativity and fear. I know it's hard, but you can do it ... and you want to do it. Your future depends on it.

Here's the deal. The economy is tough, we have a new President, the world is in a scary place, people are losing jobs, money is scarce, yada, yada, yada. We know all the bad news. Time to be cognizant, but not to succomb.

Baby boomers are strong, resilient and resourceful. We'll figure it out. I hate to say it, but money is not the most important thing in the world. Think about it ... what about health, children, friends, spouses or significant others (if you are lucky enough to have one), beauty, art, music, literature. there is so much more than just money. Yes, we need money. I haven't figured out how to pay my bills without it; however, when there's not enough, we figure it out. Can you hear a theme here: It's "figure it out."

The good news: You're not alone. We're all in this together ... everyone... in the whole friggin world is in this together. It's global.

New and innovative ideas are bursting forth exponentially. Cooperative living is coming back around. My back up plan: My sister and I and some friends all plan on living together and taking care of each other. We'll share expenses and be there for help and guidance and assistance. It'll work. Hey, it beats moving in with the kids. Unless, of course, my knight in shining armor shows up and whisks me away on his white horse and we're rich in the kingdom of plenty (I know ... I have a weird imagination.)

I strongly urge anyone reading this to be inventive. Start asking the question: What do I want to be different? Play with that question: What do I want to be different about my self, about my relationships, about my work situation. What can I DO differently that might impact myself of others in a new, improved way? Just talk this through with yourself or others ... have discussions. You'll be amazed at what will begin to come forth from your cobweb brains. Time to be ingenious and think out of the notorious box.

Lose your job? Great. Now what? What talents and interests do you have that other people need and how can you deliver it?

In my 6 STeps to ReInvent yourself, the third step is to Never, ever, ever, ever let anyone tell you what to do or not to do. Follow your own heart ... see what you have to offer and soar with it.

If this moves you.. then email me. I'm starting new ReInvention teleclasses and doing some in person.... it will help you figure it out.
I don't know about you, but when I try to figure something out on my own, I'm not nearly as effective as when I talk it out with others. The synergy of the conversation is much more productive.

So, get off your whiny horse, talk things out, think big and different and see what starts to emerge.
I'm here if you want me.
Have a great day.
Ann

A Snowy Sunday this March 1st

2009-03-01T12:02:00.002-05:00

Good morning from NYC. It's snowing now, just a little, with a major storm due in later today. I actually went to the grocery store yesterday and bought some food .. a rather novel move for me. The joy of living in NY is that just outside my door there is a mecca of food opportunities. I can buy take-out or go to any number of hundreds of foodstops/restaurants in a heartbeat. My years of cooking and shopping are well past. For me, it's simple. I keep very little around and forage as needed.

Point: Being a boomer woman, now single, with kid grown... I get to do whatever I want to do and don't have to do anything I don't want to do. Pretty cool! (although eating out does get expensive.)

After many weeks of being incredibly busy ... finishing my book, networking like crazy, positioning on the social media sites, I actually have a quiet weekend. Well, I have a cold, feel like I got hit by a truck... which is what happens when I push too hard... but none-the-less, I'm actually hanging out at home, watching old movies on TV (a rare experience for me, who hardly ever watches t.v.) and taking it easy. Can't seem to stay away from the computer, however.

I watched George Stephanopoulos this morning and got my news fix... then a bit of Meet the Press. I find it all scary, depressing and yet somehow also exciting. I think all of this will clear and we will have a new spirit, a renewed sense of what's important in life. Just hope all of our pocketbooks can hold on.

I have two things I want you to know.
1. My book, Sixty, Sexy, Sassy and Free: A Real Woman's Story of ReInvention is available for pre-order. Go here: www.sixtysexysassyandfree.com It will be delivered to me within 3 weeks and then I'll send it to you.
2. Please consider spreading the word about it. I wrote this book out of a sense of "calling." As the head boomer, I've taken on adventure and reinvention. If I can do it, you can do it ... and so can all those others out there that you know need things to be different now in their life. It's dedicated to all of you.

If you've ever had a calling ... you know it's something you HAVE to do, are compelled to do. Would just anyone take 6 months away from much of their life, scrimp, suffer to write a personal memoir? No, I don't think so. I've exposed myself so you can open up to yourself.

Now, I'm back to marketing, setting up reInvention workshops and getting on with my life. I'm thrilled (and terrified) for this project to be done.

So, these are my thoughts on a snowy Sunday in NYC, as I lay here with a terrible head cold.
Enjoy your Sunday, wherever you are.
Ann